Apology Accepted: Writing the Apologies You Never Got with Bethany Nicole
Learn How to Write Your Own Apologies and Move Forward After Divorce
In this week’s episode, Seth and Pete chat with relationship expert Bethany Nicole about the importance of letting go of past hurts through writing your own apologies. Bethany shares her unique “apology writing” process to help people heal and move forward after painful experiences like divorce.
Seth and Pete break down key steps for writing apologies for yourself when you don’t receive them from others. This allows you to validate your feelings, acknowledge what happened, and commit to showing up differently in the future.
Questions we answer in this episode:
Why is it important to let go of waiting for apologies from your ex?
How can writing your own apologies help you heal and move forward?
What are the 3 steps for writing effective apologies for yourself?
How can "writing your own apology" help you cope when a co-parent refuses to apologize or change their harmful behavior?
Key Takeaways:
Don’t wait around expecting apologies you’ll never get - take back your power.
Validating your emotions helps you process them without needing validation from others.
“Assuring” yourself that you’ll respond differently allows you to regain control of your life.
This episode is perfect for anyone going through divorce or struggling to move on from past hurts. Learn simple, practical steps to stop waiting for apologies and start writing your own path forward.
Links & Notes
Find Bethany on X (Twitter) or Instagram
Got a question you want to ask on the show? Click here!
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Pete Wright:
Welcome to How To Split a Toaster, a Divorce Podcast about saving your relationships from True Story FM. Today, it's time to stop waiting for your toaster to apologize.
Seth Nelson:
Welcome to the show, everybody. I'm Seth Nelson. As always, I'm here with my good friend Pete Wright. Today on the show, we'd like you to ask yourselves the following question. What are you waiting for? Your former spouse might have made your life miserable, your divorce might've been contentious, but if you're still waiting around for them to call you and apologize for making your life harder, this week's guest might just have another and a better way forward.
Bethany Nicole is an author, astrologer, and relationship expert. Her upcoming book, Apologies I Never Got, is a book of dating and relationship horror stories spun into gold, by teaching readers how to write their own apologies for the apologies they never got. Bethany, welcome to The Toaster.
Bethany Nicole:
Thank you. Thank you for having me.
Pete Wright:
Bethany, I think it's funny. We're a divorce podcast and I don't think we've done a show ... Seth, correct me ... I don't think we've done a show on actually apologizing.
Seth Nelson:
Nope.
Bethany Nicole:
Wow.
Pete Wright:
I don't think the word has ever come up.
Bethany Nicole:
There's not a lot of that in divorces.
Seth Nelson:
I think we should apologize to our listeners for that, that it's waited this long.
Bethany Nicole:
There you go.
Pete Wright:
It feels like a variable in the equation that we have missed. Today, we are going to talk about the apology and by way of a backdoor, which I think is so interesting. But before we start talking about you in the book, let's talk a little bit why it is important to become an apologist.
That doesn't sound very good, but an expert in the art of the apology. What led you to figuring out that apologies were important?
Bethany Nicole:
Oh my gosh, it was such a journey of the soul, but basically it's similar to a lot of other people's journeys. My life just wasn't working, I couldn't get it to work. I had all of these resentments built up from past relationships, my childhood. Basically, I've had a lot of opportunities for apologies that I never got in my own life, and I kept hitting the wall on that, and it just really led me to realize I'm never going to get these apologies.
I've been waiting for them, I've been resentful. I've been thinking oh, if I just get them, then that's going to solve all these problems. I realized even if these people came around and apologized for every aspect of it, I'm not sure that would really do it. I started this game with some friends of writing our own apologies for the ones we never got. It really just snowballed and started to take off. I really just started to understand as I got into working with relationships and my professional career, people were coming to me with the same problem. They're like, "I'm dating the same person over and over." We would dig into it, and so much of it had to do with these apologies they never got, with these resentments that they're bringing.
Pete Wright:
That they're resentful so they date similar typed people, because deep in our subconscious, we think maybe this is the person who's going to give me the apology that I'm owed.
Bethany Nicole:
Right, or they're trying to heal it. Our subconscious is such a weird place. We do the strangest things.
Pete Wright:
Yeah, it's a weird place.
Seth Nelson:
I try not to go there.
Bethany Nicole:
Right. It's a dark, scary place.
Pete Wright:
Because you were talking about your own experience. How does it show up that you are waiting for it? What are the resentments that start bubbling up? How does that show up in your life?
All I'm trying to get to is if our listeners are sitting there saying, okay, what are the patterns that I need to be watching out for?
Bethany Nicole:
You really hear it in conversations. You hear the resentment, you hear the anger, you hear the frustration. It's somebody who's on a first date and they're just talking about all the ways their ex has screwed them over, or they're talking about their childhood trauma to someone they've known a week. It's like they just want to get it out. It's just something that's really building up, or they're doing something like they're very possessive of their new partner because their ex cheated on them and they just never really got past it.
It's really just showing up that again, your life just isn't working. Your relationships aren't working and you're angry or taking it out on things. It can show up again in really strange ways because of the subconscious, but I think if you're really having partners that are reflecting that back to you "Hey, I didn't cheat on you. I didn't do this. Why are you yelling at me?" Or "Why am I having to pay for someone else's mistakes?" I think you can recognize oh, maybe I didn't work through some things here.
Pete Wright:
Yeah, it's like a jolt out of an old reality.
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, or again, if you're dating the same type of person. Most of my work, that's pretty much exactly where I start is, okay, what's going on with you? Because so much of our external relationships depend on what's going on with us internally. There's so much out there about forgiveness and what it looks like and how to get over divorces and all of these things.
Seth Nelson:
Let's talk through that, because I talk to my clients all the time, and I ask them this question if they're struggling on moving forward with their divorce. I just say, "Do you want to feel the way you feel now a year or two from now?" The answer is always "No." Then you have to do something about it.
I will always tell them when they're struggling with the divorce process, even if they want it and they're doing everything they're supposed to do, but it's just frustratingly slow, agonizing expensive. I always tell them, "You're going through a legal divorce and you're going through an emotional divorce."
Bethany Nicole:
Absolutely.
Seth Nelson:
"What I know for certain, you will not get through your emotional divorce until your legal divorce is over."
Bethany Nicole:
Yes, absolutely. That's really something I work with my clients too. Even the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the safety and the health, that is our baseline. We can work on the relationship aspect of being friends with your ex or whatever it is on the other side of the legal divorce. I think that's where people can really get stuck too, is they're like, "Well, I want to be friends with them and I want it to go so smoothly." Just back burner that, not that you should be intentionally creating drama or situations, but let the lawyers do their thing. Let the divorce go through and work on yourself while that's happening.
Take that time to be going to experts and therapists and working on your yourself. Then once that legal piece is done, now you're in a place of safety that you can start even more intense healing or maybe even thinking about, well, what do I want this relationship with this ex to look like if we're co-parenting or whatever. But I know especially in the spiritual community, a lot of the clients I work with are like, "That's so mean to just talk through attorneys." I'm like, "That's not mean. That's a nice legal foot in people's back to do the right thing. That's a beautiful thing."
Pete Wright:
That's practical. Yeah, right.
Seth Nelson:
The other thing about that is talking through attorneys is one, it sets up healthy boundaries for you, because I'll have lawyers that will say, "Well, let's sit down and have a settlement conference with just the lawyers and the parties." I say, "No," and they're like, "Well, why not? It's so reasonable." I say, "Because I don't know the power dynamics between these people. Being in the same room might not be healthy for your client. It might be beneficial for my client. I don't know."
We have a mediator that goes back and forth and that has that separation and protection, but when you're in a divorce, there are formal conversations the parties are having with the court system with the judge through their lawyers. There's conversations the lawyers have with each other. There's obviously conversations lawyer have with their clients and then there's conversations that the parties are having with each other.
I assure you, never once has the opposing party said, "Oh my God, your lawyer is so good. They're totally handling you and making this process easier. I mean, it's just great." People don't even know me and they talk to their spouse and they say, "He's horrible. He's running up fees. He's doing all this, this and this," and I've been on the case for a week and I've only had one consult.
Part of that is that control aspect. When you only talk through lawyers, it sets up a healthy boundary to protect you. Now look, the lawyers got to do a job if they're not being responsive to you and making sure you have a good attorney-client relationship is vital in that, but absolutely I'm all for that.
Pete Wright:
Seth, we've been talking down for nine minutes, and that should have been plenty of time for you to prepare your arguments about why people don't say, "I'm sorry" enough in court. Why are we not talking about apologies? Do you think at some point, do you ever call on your clients to just say, "I'm sorry"?
Seth Nelson:
I haven't told them to say "I'm sorry," because if they're not really sorry, if it's not genuine-
Pete Wright:
That doesn't help.
Seth Nelson:
... It's going to make it worse.
Bethany Nicole:
It doesn't do anything.
Seth Nelson:
What I have taught them through the litigation process is to own your mistakes. What that does is makes you honest, open, and vulnerable in court, which I think judges find persuasive. I think that it also takes the wind out of opposing counsel's sails when they're trying to attack your credibility.
"Mr. Wright, have you ever lied?" "Yes."
Pete Wright:
I mean, okay.
Seth Nelson:
It's just easier to do that, but I haven't had them say, "I'm sorry." I've had a judge order opposing party to apologize to my client in open court.
It was the most awkward bullshit apology I have ever heard in my life.
Bethany Nicole:
I can't imagine that would be especially genuine or helpful.
Pete Wright:
Nope, nope.
Seth Nelson:
Yeah, we walked out of the courtroom and my client was like, "What the fuck was that?" Especially when the judge ruled against us and gave the guy everything he wanted.
Pete Wright:
Well, you can't dodge the horse shit about this stuff, right? You want to make it authentic, but I do think one of the things that you're talking about is maybe tantamount to apology is taking that responsibility. When you say you got to own your shit, you're taking accountability, responsibility for your actions. How far does that go to being enough to smooth a contentious divorce?
Bethany Nicole:
I really work with my clients a lot more on, because really forgiveness and all of that is more about what's going on with you than it's with them. I can't even off the top of my head think of a time where I really felt they should reach out to the other person, because I really work on it on the internal energetic level, because of that exact reason. It's rarely enough. It's rarely what they genuinely need to hear. It's like writing your own apologies for the ones you never got, and learning how to reach those levels of forgiveness without [inaudible 00:11:43].
Seth Nelson:
What is that like? How does that go? Pete, he owes me a lot of apologies.
Pete Wright:
I actually have a diary. It's just Seth apology letters because he never apologizes to me either.
Seth Nelson:
They're not coming though. He doesn't publish them. I'm annoyed with Pete. He's wronged me in my own mind. How do I write my own apology?
Bethany Nicole:
I have a three-step process that I take people through, and it can be more in depth or whatever, but long story short, basically I take them through the three steps of the first one being validation. You're validating your emotional experience, and this is where it's hard when you're getting an apology from someone else, because having someone apologize to you for the way that you are feeling about something is ...
Seth Nelson:
That's not an apology.
Bethany Nicole:
Right. That's tricky, right?
Seth Nelson:
"I'm so sorry you feel like I annoyed you or wronged you."
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, exactly.
Pete Wright:
"I'm sorry you took that wrong."
Bethany Nicole:
"I'm sorry you were annoyed by me." What do I say to that?
But our internal experience, we never want to invalidate how we feel about something because how we feel is how we feel. That's not necessarily on somebody else's shoulders because we have our own internal dialogues, and maybe somebody does something very small to us, but it reminds us of something our father did to us all the time and so we have this big emotional reaction, but that's not really that person's fault per se. The validation of the emotions is the internal work, where they literally just write out every emotion that it made them feel. They're taking their own apologies for that. They're apologizing, "I'm sorry you feel angry. I'm sorry you feel hurt. I'm sorry you feel jilted," or whatever it is.
They're validating their own emotional experience without asking the other person to do that, because again, they may never get it. We can't really have someone say, "I'm sorry I made you feel x, y, or z." No one can really make us feel anything. I take them through that emotional validation piece, and it's completely unfiltered, whatever they feel. If it's "I'm sorry you feel like you really want to punch your partner in the face every time you see them," that's fine. That's cool. Let's just get it out. Let's just move through that process.
Seth Nelson:
That's right. It's like in middle school when they're going to go to sex ed and we're like, okay, "We're going to say all the bad words right now." We're just going to it out.
Bethany Nicole:
Just get it out, get it out, do it out.
Pete Wright:
Get it all out.
Bethany Nicole:
Then there's the acknowledgement piece. That's another thing that can be really tough to get from somebody else, because you're really just acknowledging even at base level, this experience was painful for me, or this experience hurt me, my feelings or this experience wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that I was loyal to my partner and they cheated on me, left, right, and sideways.
You're just acknowledging that was not cool, that was not fair, that did not feel good. I didn't deserve that. No one deserves that. You're just acknowledging the fact that the experience happened and that it was painful, hurtful, unfair, whatever it was. You're just allowing that reality to exist, that this happened, I'm acknowledging it happened. It is what it is. There's no changing it, and it sucked at base level. It can get more nuanced than that. This is just very basic.
Seth Nelson:
Got it.
Bethany Nicole:
Then the part that, the third step, which is actually really the part that I feel is the most empowering for people is what we call the assurance stage, because if you're within a partnership let's say, and somebody yells at you and what do you really want from an apology? Yeah, you want the emotional validation, but you really want them to understand why it hurt to the point that they don't do it again. You want the assurance this is not going to happen again, but we can't control that from somebody else.
We can't control that the person you're divorcing isn't going to yell at you again, you can't control any of that. But the assurance piece is that you can show up to the experience differently. You can be the difference in what's happening. When I look at people who are dating and they had a really bad past experience with someone, and they're not getting that apology, their assurance looks like, okay, I'm going to assure myself that I'm going to show up to these dates and I'm going to pay attention to these red flags. I'm going to ask these questions. I'm going to say what I want or need out of this relationship.
That we can 100% control, that is absolutely within our control. Even if we end up on the same type of date with the same type of person, how we show up can be the difference. It doesn't mean that it's never going to ... we might get divorced again, who knows? But you can show up to that divorce experience different. You can show up to that conversation, that courtroom, whatever it is, you're giving yourself different assurances.
These are very concrete steps that I like to have people create for themselves. If they're like, "I know this is coming from some childhood trauma," so your assurance is "I assure myself that I'm going to go to therapy and I got my first appointment set for Monday" or whatever it is. It's really concrete, it's really empowered and it's really forward-thinking.
Pete Wright:
I love it. I had a therapist when I was a kid who told me this one thing. I don't remember much about it, but he told me one thing that stuck with me, and I think you're just nailing it, which is "Your power in life ends with your skin. It ends with what you can touch. So don't bother thinking about these ... spending a lot of time perseverating on slights done by others."
I think you're hitting it. Sit down and write out what feels fulfilling to you. My further question though is there room in this process when you're working with people holding someone else to account for genuine wrongs? Or is it just these are only the things we know we're never going to get an apology for?
For everything else we call Seth.
Bethany Nicole:
As far as reaching out to that person to get an apology or?
Pete Wright:
Yeah, I don't know. Is that a thing?
Seth Nelson:
Nope. She said no. It's all internal, right, Bethany?
Bethany Nicole:
It's mostly internal, yeah. If the client is sitting in front of me has really wronged and they feel ... there would have to be a lot of internal work done because part of if I would encourage them to reach out if they really I felt like did something that they would benefit from apologizing for, it would be a lot of work to create a safe space for them to do that, because that's really vulnerable experience to apologize to someone. If you're really dependent on their response, you can really do a lot more damage. Because if you write this really lovely apology and you give it to them and they're like, "You know what? Go eff off. I don't really care. That was stupid and I hate you." Then they're crushed and they're like, "Oh, I did this thing."
Seth Nelson:
Right. But I always tell people, all you can do is apologize. You've done the work.
Bethany Nicole:
Right. That's where you work on helping them release.
Seth Nelson:
If you've done that and you want to be vulnerable and they're going to tell you to "fuck off, that was stupid." Well, you got your answer.
Bethany Nicole:
You got your answer, yeah.
Seth Nelson:
Right, but you've come clean on that. I'm imagining you working with clients about you have these past relationships, you never got these apologies, they go through this three-step process. This is all great. I truly think this is amazing. Then they're going out on new relationships and they're setting boundaries.
How does this work when the person you're writing the apology for, the ones you never got is your co-parent and they keep doing the same shit?
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, that's a tough one because again, that's where the assurance ... and there's also the release of you can only do what you can do. The assurance is where they can really get tough of, okay, this co-parent is doing something. How far off is it? Is it legally something you can do something about?
Seth Nelson:
Because that legal process is so easy and inexpensive, why not just try it?
Bethany Nicole:
Right, right.
Pete Wright:
Sure.
Bethany Nicole:
Everyone should do it.
Pete Wright:
Everyone should do more law stuff.
Bethany Nicole:
Think of the scale, right?
Seth Nelson:
All the cool kids are doing it.
Bethany Nicole:
I think you can only do what you can do. If you're up against the wall of I can't afford to hire this attorney to do it again, then you work on other ways to show up differently. Sometimes there's really just ... parents are going to do what parents are going to do. I think we all have seen that. Yeah, you might have a co-parent who continues to badmouth you in front of the kids, and all you can do about that if you've talked to them 1000 times and they don't care and they're just continuing to do it, is work on how you show up to handle it and try to help your kid through it.
Maybe even teach them some things to say of, "I don't want to talk about that," or have your kid working with a therapist, or these other ways that you can control what you can control, because short of gagging someone, we can't make them stop saying something to our kid even though it's causing damage.
Courts don't really do a lot about that unless it's threatening or something, but that's again where the assurance piece comes. Yes, they might continue to do it, you might be bound to this person that's continuing to talk badly about you to your own kids, but what can you do? How can you show up? The rest, you really just have to let it go.
Pete Wright:
How do you think about the wonder twins, blame and shame? I imagine these are concepts that come up often, people who are holding on to grief and slight of others, either blaming others, blaming themselves, taking on a lot of shame themselves. How do you coach people through getting past those very difficult emotions?
Bethany Nicole:
Absolutely. It's really just one step at a time. It's seeing where those are showing up, because a lot of times how we react to blame and shame, that's been formed a long time ago. If we're growing up in a household where every time we do the slightest thing wrong, we're getting absolutely demolished, we might actually be programmed in some ways to take on more blame or shame then we actually need to. Does that make sense?
Seth Nelson:
100%.
Bethany Nicole:
We're showing up to an experience that maybe we had a small role in it, but we're like, "It's all my fault. I did it, throw me under the bus. It's fine." We don't need to do that. Really just working with them and seeing what is their patterning around blame and shame? Then you have the other side, where people don't want to take any accountability. They want to play the blame game, and it really just gets them absolutely nowhere. Really creating victim, villain roles. There's no point in that really.
It's hard in divorce, because sometimes it really does seem like somebody is the instigator or somebody is causing harm to the kids. There's a lot of nuances with it of all of that, but creating that dynamic doesn't leave any room for change. If you're just like, this person's the villain and there's nothing I can do about it. What have you accomplished with that? That's done nothing for you. That's put you in a victim role, in a powerless role.
Pete Wright:
Head canon is legit though, the stories we tell ourselves. That can be rough.
Seth Nelson:
They're never wrong.
Bethany Nicole:
Never, never. 100% right all of the time. Not in 100.
Pete Wright:
Well, not about me.
Okay, let's talk about what went into this book, Apologies I Never Got. What's in the book? How'd you come up with the concept? How'd you build it? Let's talk about the stories.
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah. It really just began again with my own life not working and then sharing the concept with my friends and my friend group at the time. We just made it a game and it was sort of a joke. I got a ton of material that way of just people telling me all these really offbeat relationship and dating stories, and everybody has them. Everyone's got a horror story. I have so much material. I've already placed part of it into the sequel, because I just got so much of the fun stuff or the funny stuff.
Then I dive into the deeper concepts of the three step apology method and why we're addressing these things with a little bit of lightness and a little bit of humor, but then I get into some of the deeper stuff of the three-step apology method. Forgiveness, why forgiveness is an important part of the healing process. How do you get there? What do you do? How do you forgive something that feels very unforgivable?
Then I also have pieces within it that talk about just more healthy relationship dynamics. It's split into chapters of let's say gaslighting. All of the apologies in that category are gaslighting. Then we go into, okay, what is gaslighting? How do you have some boundaries around that? What does it mean? It really takes readers through a journey of self-healing, and then also helping them prepare for their next relationships by learning some of these relationship trends or dynamics that they can take moving forward.
The whole point of all of it in my mind is really health, healing, and then moving forward, because all of this stuff, all of these resentments, the whole point, what do we pursue in life? We want to live a healthy, happy, engaged life. That's really the focus of the book. It's not so much about blame or shame or openly mocking our exes, even though there might be a little nuggets of that. But at the end [inaudible 00:25:00].
Pete Wright:
It's not just that that could be catharsis.
Seth Nelson:
Well, first off, Bethany, I think you're brilliant because basically you were talking with your friends and joking around and you take all that material and make a book.
Pete Wright:
I think you got that shit right.
Seth Nelson:
Awesome.
Pete Wright:
That's smart.
Seth Nelson:
You know they're like, I'm writing the apology that Bethany never gave me for giving me a piece of that part.
Pete Wright:
In reading up on you, I know that this happens to be a favorite of yours, but would you please tell the bike story out of the book? Because I died, I died.
Bethany Nicole:
This is real. This happened to a friend of mine in Los Angeles, and it was her first date with a guy. She knew he took an Uber there because they had text. He was like, "Oh, yeah. I'm in an Uber. I'm five minutes out." She knew this was not his bike. This becomes important later.
They're at dinner, they're just having very normal first state conversations. He politely excuses himself. She assumes he's going to the bathroom. She watches him leave through the front glass window. He literally stole someone's bike from out front and pedaled away on it, and she never heard from him again.
No explanation, nothing. This guy, I call this Bye-Bye Biker. He literally just took this bike and rode away from a first date with her. No explanation, never heard from him again, probably my favorite.
Seth Nelson:
I'm really thinking this through here.
Pete Wright:
That takes such balls and is also a complete sociopath.
Bethany Nicole:
[inaudible 00:26:38] because eventually because it's a glass front window. She can see him doing all of it. I can't even ...
Seth Nelson:
But really what I'm thinking here is if I'm her and this guy never wants to see me again, this is the perfect way to leave and here's why.
Pete Wright:
How do you do that?
Seth Nelson:
Here's why. It's because at the end, normally it's like, "Oh, I'll text you." And they don't, they ghost you. You'll forget about that guy forever.
This gives her a hilarious story for the rest of her life.
Pete Wright:
Yeah, for sure.
Seth Nelson:
I really think there's a list here to be made of funny ways people left first dates.
Pete Wright:
I think the only way that this would've been better is if he'd stolen her bike. If she had ridden. That is maybe the only chef's kiss.
Bethany Nicole:
That would have been perfection.
Pete Wright:
She just watches this guy ghost her by stealing her own bike. That would've been perfect.
Bethany Nicole:
That would've been perfect. Yes.
Pete Wright:
The thread of the stories are like that. Walk through, just as we get to ... Dorothy, I can't get over that story.
Seth Nelson:
You're still on the bike story.
Pete Wright:
It's too good. I just love it.
Bethany Nicole:
They're all true, by the way, as far as I know. I had some submissions and some people fill in the gap, a friend of a friend, but as far as I know, all of them are true, directly experienced by people.
Pete Wright:
God, it's fantastic. It's fantastic.
Seth Nelson:
Is this a skill you could teach your kids?
Bethany Nicole:
To write their own apologies for the ones they never got?
Seth Nelson:
Yeah.
Bethany Nicole:
Absolutely, especially in that simple of a form, because the way they're phrased in the book, they're not through the whole three set of apologies. It's just, "I'm sorry I left you on a first date by stealing someone's bike and riding away." That's not how it's phrased. It's more clever in the book, but that's the basic gist. Absolutely, we did it all the time in the realm of dating. It was just funny.
That's an apology I'll never get, and then you just jokingly write it yourself. I think it really does release the tension and the emotion. I think kids would love it. I think kids would have a great time doing it, and especially because I give them little titles. I think kids would really love to come up with creative little titles for the apology they never got.
Pete Wright:
It really is so cathartic, and I think kids are just so imaginative. I think that could be really a wonderful creative exercise.
Seth Nelson:
That could be with whether their friends did something to them, maybe it's something that hurt them very deeply in the divorce process.
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, they could definitely add some emotion stuff to that. They could do the process in a very simplified five form for sure, with somebody helping them through it. Yeah, they could definitely do it.
Pete Wright:
Definitely. You said there's a sequel in you? You getting more stories, you've got more to talk about?
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, it's about halfway done. It's The Apologies I Still Never Got is going to be the title, the working title.
Seth Nelson:
I just feel like you know how there's always ... it gives a title of the book and then it has another line under it explaining it? I think it should be The Apologies I Still Never Got, You Fucking Rat Bastard.
That's what was going on in my head.
Pete Wright:
I'm not bitter at all.
Bethany Nicole:
I'm not bitter at all. Hashtag, you're not bitter at all.
Pete Wright:
Yeah, in parentheses. Yeah, it's just great stuff.
Where would you like to point people to learn more about your work and find the book? It sounds like you're not in LA anymore.
Bethany Nicole:
No, I'm in Dallas. I'm in Dallas now.
Seth Nelson:
That's when the guy rode off with the horse.
Bethany Nicole:
That's right. That would be horrible [inaudible 00:30:13]. Definitely.
Yeah. Definitely they can find the book. The book is still with the agent, so we don't have a complete date out yet, but there's a matching blog and Instagram that has some of the apologies. That's Apologies I Never Got.com. That's really the website for the book.
Pete Wright:
Okay, that's where we'll send people. It should be released soon?
Bethany Nicole:
Yeah, it should be. Then my website has more of my freelance writing, some of the more relationship and astrology stuff as well is more what my website, the apologies is more relationship centered, less astrology, and more focused on the book.
Pete Wright:
Well, it's great.
Seth Nelson:
All right. I'm just going to ask, I'm not astrology guy. Do you believe that stuff?
Bethany Nicole:
Absolutely. I help clients with it all the time. You'd be amazed.
Now we're not putting 17 quiz astrology. We're talking very deep, just even on the piece of communication styles, different things like that.
Seth Nelson:
When you know someone's birthday and their sign, you can say, "Well, here's some general traits about them that are generally true"?
Bethany Nicole:
Mm-hmm.
Seth Nelson:
All right, July 24th,
Pete Wright:
We're going to drop it.
Seth Nelson:
We're doing it Bethany, and we'll see. I'm a Leo, I'm on the cusp.
Bethany Nicole:
The fact that you're even doing this podcast is very leo of you. They like to be seen, they like to be heard, they like to be on video, they like to be ... usually attorneys are more in the virgo line, but again, if you're in court, that's like being the star of a show.
Yeah, leo's, they're very leadership oriented. They're very fiery, they're fire signs. They're very big guy in charge, which my attorney is actually a leo, so that could be. That's very much his personality.
Seth Nelson:
Pete, you're keep nodding your head in agreement here.
Pete Wright:
I'm feeling pretty good about this so far. Let's bring it.
Seth Nelson:
For all those times I was writing this show, this is all coming back to haunt me as one.
Pete Wright:
This feels good. It all starts with "I'm not an astrology guy."
Bethany Nicole:
Oh, you guys just fall into my archetype completely and fully.
Pete Wright:
Yeah, just lockstep, hand meet glove. That's amazing.
Seth Nelson:
Anything else about me that you're going to divulge that people probably already know if they're listening to this show, but you're putting me in my place?
Pete Wright:
Never eat steak on Wednesdays.
Bethany Nicole:
I would need to see the full chart, right? There's layers, there's different signs, there's where your Venus is. That's what I really look at for relationships. I built a successful business on it, so I must be doing something right with it.
Seth Nelson:
Well, I got to tell you, you're off to a very good start. I'm going to have to eat my words right there. I apologize for doubting you.
Bethany Nicole:
It's an apology I probably will never get, so it's fine. I'll just write it myself later. The podcast guy didn't believe in astrology and it hurt my feelings.
Pete Wright:
Could not script the end of this show any better. I'm telling you that right now.
Anyway, I don't care what your sign is, head over to the website or swipe up in your show notes and click on the links to find Bethany everywhere. We've got links to all of the socials and the Gram and the X and the websites and all of the stuff.
Thank you, Bethany. That's fantastic. So appreciate you for being here today.
Bethany Nicole:
Thank you for having me.
Pete Wright:
On behalf of Bethany Nicole, the one who wrote this book that we're talking about, not the other one.
Bethany Nicole:
Not the children's book author.
Pete Wright:
Not the children's book, and Seth Nelson, America's favorite divorce attorney, I'm Pete Wright. We'll catch you next week right here on How to Split A Toaster, a Divorce Podcast about saving your relationships.
Outro:
How to Split A Toaster is part of the True Story FM podcast Network, produced by Andy Nelson. Music by T Bless and the professionals and DB Studios. Seth Nelson is an attorney with NLG Divorce & Family Law with offices in Tampa, Florida.
While we may be discussing family law topics, how to split a toaster is not intended to, nor is it providing legal advice. Every situation is different. If you have specific questions regarding your situation, please seek your own legal counsel with an attorney licensed to practice law in your jurisdiction.
Pete Wright is not an attorney or employee of NLG Divorce & Family Law. Seth Nelson is licensed to practice law in Florida.
